The Authority That's Actually Yours

There is a specific kind of exhaustion that comes from leading outside your actual authority — and most of us have been there. You're pouring energy into decisions that aren't yours, influence you haven't yet earned, or systems too many levels above you to touch. Meanwhile, the things that genuinely belong to you go unattended.

In this episode — the fourth in the Clarity Season — Danita explores what it means to lead from your actual authority. Not the authority you wish you had. Not the authority you think you deserve. The authority that is genuinely, faithfully yours.

She walks through three dimensions of authority — given, earned, and spiritual — and four practical principles for leading well within your actual scope. And she brings it all back to a question worth sitting with: Are you using the authority you do have, or are you too focused on what you can't control to steward what's already in your hands?

In This Episode

• Why operating outside your actual authority is one of the greatest sources of exhaustion in leadership and in life
• Three dimensions of authority: given (role-defined), earned (trust and relationship-based), and spiritual (character and faithfulness over time)
• Why 'rightness' is not the same as authority — and why that matters for how you show up
• What real spiritual authority looks like vs. the misuse of spiritual language to demand compliance
• Four principles: know what's yours, use what you have, respect the authority of others, and earn what you can't be given
• A reflection from 2 Corinthians 10 — how even Paul led within God-assigned boundaries
• The question that may finally unlock the clarity you've been looking for

Scripture Referenced

2 Corinthians 10 — Paul on staying within the boundaries God assigned to him

This Week's Reflection

Find a quiet place. Grab a pen. Write down the three dimensions of authority — given, earned, spiritual — and honestly assess:

• Where do I have authority?
• Where don't I have authority?
• Where am I operating outside my actual scope?

And then the harder question: Am I using the authority I do have, or am I so focused on what I can't control that I'm neglecting what I can?

Take the Quiz

Want to know what you bring to the table when you're leading from a clear, honest place? Take the free quiz — What's Secretly Sabotaging Your Leadership? — and find out what may be quietly working against your clarity.

https://www.tryinteract.com/share/quiz/6990f7d1dcb58e00156d7e2f

Transcript

Danita 0:02

Hey, welcome to ENTRUSTED to Lead. I'm Denita Cummins. This is episode four of Our Clarity Season, which is an eight episode series on leadership clarity for complex seasons. So if you're just joining us, here's where we've been. Episode one explored why clarity is not the same as certainty. Episode two helped you name what's actually yours to carry. Episode three was about the discipline of subtraction and how we let go of good things to make room for the right things. Today we're going one layer deeper So grab your coffee friend and let's get started. I think one of the greatest sources of exhaustion in life, not just like in a job title, but in all the places where we carry responsibility comes from operating outside of our actual authority. Sometimes when we're trying to influence things, we don't have the power to influence, we wonder why we are so drained, and sometimes we're avoiding the authority that we do have, and then we also wonder why nothing is changing. And sometimes, maybe most of all, we genuinely don't know what our authority is because no one has ever clearly defined it. So we're left kind of guessing we're overstepping in some places and we're under stepping into others. So let me give you an example of what that might feel like, or if this might feel familiar. Think about the person at church who's been asked to lead a ministry team. And this could also be at work. And they've said yes because they care. But nobody ever told them where their authority starts and stops. So they find themselves trying to manage the budget, which probably isn't theirs, trying to influence the senior pastor or senior leader's vision, which isn't theirs, and they're trying to fix all of these relational dynamics between the team members who have existed probably for years, which isn't theirs either. Meanwhile, all of these things, or the things that are theirs. Setting up the tone for the team, communicating clearly, developing the people who showed up. Those things are being neglected because all of their energy is going somewhere else. Do you see, or maybe you can think about the parent who is trying to control their adult child's life choices. They have authority in their own home and in their own values. In how they show up in the relationship that they do have, but they're spending all of their emotional energy trying to direct outcomes that they simply can't control, and it is exhausting, and it is wearing both them down and the relationship down as well. Or maybe it's the person at work who keeps trying to fix a broken system that's three levels above their role and they see the problem very clearly, and they might even be right about what the solution needs to be, but they don't have the authority to make the change and the constant pushing is leaving them frustrated and increasingly invisible. I spent a lot of years in that space. That is super hard. But in each one of these cases, the problem isn't a lack of passion or the person's lack of ability. The problem is a lack of clarity about what is actually theirs to carry. Where does their authority lie? So the question is how do you get clear about what your actual authority. Once you've started sorting out what's yours and what isn't yours, once you've begun subtracting what no longer belongs, then a new question will surface. What authority do I actually have? And I know the word authority might make some of you uncomfortable and for good reason. I think because sometimes, well, a lot of times authority has been abused or misused or weaponized like, but that could be a whole different podcast. And we've all seen people claim authority when they didn't have it or wield it in ways that harmed rather than helped. But avoiding the conversation about authority doesn't help us when it doesn't make it go away. It just means that you are leading from confusion instead of clarity, and that's not what we're about. So today we're gonna talk about what it means to lead from your actual authority, not the authority you wish you had, not the authority someone else has, but the authority that is genuinely yours. So I'm gonna offer you three dimensions to consider, and these can apply whether you're leading a team or you're serving in a church or raising a family, or if you're simply trying to be a good steward of your own life, which we love. So the dimension number one is given authority. This is the authority that comes with a role or a position. It's defined by whatever structure you're operating in. So it could be your job description or your role as a team, your place in a family, or your assignment at church. It answers questions like, what decisions can I actually make here? What am I genuinely responsible for and what is within my scope and what isn't? Given authority is not the only kind of authority, and it's not always the most important, but it is real. It's a real thing, and it's worth understanding very clearly because when you operate within your given authority, you have a legitimate ground to stand on, and when you operate outside of it, no matter how passionate you are or how right you might be, you don't. The second dimension is earned authority. This is the authority that comes from trust, consistency, and relationships. You can't demand it. You can't claim it. You earn it over time by showing up with integrity and by doing good work. Earned authority is what allows you to influence beyond your formal role. It's why people listen to you, but not because they have to, but because they've seen who you are Over time. But here's the thing about earned authority. It's contextual. So you might have deep trust within your family, but you might have very little influence at work. You might have earned authority in one area of your church but not another. Or you might have it in some people and not with others, and that's okay. The key is knowing where you have it and where you don't, and being honest about the difference. I think about someone I know who keeps getting frustrated that their ideas weren't being heard in a particular group, and they keep saying, but I'm right. This is the right decision. And maybe you are right, but rightness isn't authority. Sorry, they hadn't yet built trust with that specific group. They hadn't yet demonstrated results in the area that they were trying to influence. And it didn't mean that they should stop sharing ideas, but it does mean that they needed to be patient or to build relationships first. And they needed to show up consistently before expecting to be followed because earned authority takes time, and sorry to say it, but there is no shortcut. That's just how it works. And the third dimension is spiritual authority. And I think this is the hardest to define, and it's often the easiest to misuse if we're, we're speaking candid here because spiritual authority isn't positional. It is not something you are given by an organization or a title. It is something that flows from your intimacy with God, your character, and your faithfulness over time. It's the kind of authority that causes people to trust your discernment and to seek your wisdom. And to follow your example, not because of your position, but because of who you are. But here's the danger, and I wanna say this carefully because I think it's super important. Spiritual authority can be claimed by people who don't actually have it. We see that a lot, don't we? We have seen someone use, God told me. As a way to shut down conversations or bulldoze over legitimate concerns. And we've seen people confuse their preference with God's will. Mm. And then demand compliance in the name of faith. And that is not spiritual authority. Friend. That's manipulation. Real spiritual authority is humble and it invites discernment and it makes space for others to hear from God too. It does not demand, it draws you closer. So where does that leave us today? Let me give you four principles that have helped me and that I think maybe hopefully will help you too. So principle number one is that you need to know what's yours. I want you to get honest, clarity about what authority you actually have, not the authority you wish you had, or what you think you should have had, but what you actually have. Because if you're not sure, then it's definitely worth asking. You need to ask your supervisor or your pastor, or ask whoever defines your role, have a conversation because operating on assumed authority is a recipe for frustration on every side. Principle two is use what you have. I love this. This is my most favorite. I say it all the time. What do you have in your hand today? Danita. Use that one thing. This is the one that gets me. Some of us, probably more than some, are so focused on what we can't do that we neglect what we can do. You might not have authority over the whole organization, but you have authority over your own integrity and your own growth and your own next step, right? You control your own two feet. You might not be able to change the culture of your workplace, but you can set the tone in your own conversations, your own team, your own corner of the world or of the room, and you might not be able to fix your family. I know it's hard, but you can show up as the healthiest version of yourself in it. So use what you have and then steward that thing well and don't waste your energy resenting what you don't have. Okay. Principle number three is that you have to respect the authority of others, and this goes both directions because if you want people to respect your authority, then you need to respect theirs, right? That means not undermining decisions that you disagree with, not working around people or systems because you think you know better, and definitely not speaking poorly about other people's leadership when they're not in the room. That's never okay. Even when you think you're right, even when you think they're wrong. That's not an excuse. You can't do that. Because when you undermine authority, even if it's flawed authority, you teach the people around you, that authority itself is optional and eventually that comes back around. And principle number four is you earn what you can't be given. If you want more influence, you have to earn it. You have to build trust and you have to show up consistently, and you have to deepen relationships, and that demonstrates faithfulness in the small things, but you can't demand it or manipulate for it, and don't resent others who have it. Just earn it slowly and steadily over time. The way trust has always been built, one brick upon another. So here is what I found in my own life and in the lives of the people that I've walked alongside in leadership and love and life. When you get clear about your actual authority, you lead with more confidence and less frustration. You are not constantly fighting battles that you can't win and you're not overstepping and creating conflict. You are not under stepping and avoiding what's actually yours. You find that you lead from a place of honesty, and that honesty changes everything. It really does. It's the same thread that's been running through this whole clarity season. In episode two, we talked about naming what's yours to carry, and in episode three we talked about subtracting what no longer serves you. And now in this episode, we're talking about leading from what is actually been entrusted to you, not more, not less. What's yours? Super powerful. Here's a line from two Corinthians 10 where Paul says he won't boast about work done in someone else's territory. He says. He stays within the boundaries that God has assigned to him. Super powerful. Think about Paul, think about the impact that he had on the world, and I love that because it tells us something very essential that even Paul, the one God called by name, right, who had every reason to push beyond his scope, he chose to honor the boundaries of what was his. Trust allows you to lead within limits without guilt. You are never meant to be omnipresent or indispensable. God designed authority with boundaries. And those boundaries aren't limitations. They're actually gifts because they free you to lead well in your lane without carrying the weight of everyone else's. So here's what I want you to do this week. Same rhythm as always. Find a quiet spot, a pen and a paper, and maybe some coffee. And write down the three dimensions of authority. Are they given? Are they earned and spiritual? And then I want you to honestly assess. Where do I have authority? Where don't I have authority, and where am I trying to operate outside my actual scope? That seems kind of easy. So then I'm gonna give you a hard one. Here's a bonus point, but then I want you to even ask the harder question, am I using the authority I do have, or am I so focused on what I can't control, that I'm neglecting what I can? Because the clarity you're looking for might not come from gaining more authority. It might come from finally faithfully using what is already yours. So before you go, if you wanna know what you bring to the table when you are leading from a clear, honest place. I have created a quick quiz called What is Your Leadership Superpower, and it only takes a couple minutes and you will find the link only in today's show notes. That's the only place you're gonna find it. But I want you to take it, check it out, take the quiz, let me know what you think. I'd love to hear your results and see how we can help you grow. As always, this is the Entrusted to Lead podcast. I'm Danida Cummins, and thanks friend for being here. It means a lot. In the next episode, in this clarity season, we are knocking'em out. We are talking about what happens when you are stuck in reactive mode, constantly responding to what's urgent instead of leading from what actually matters. I hear that from people and leaders all the time, so we're gonna dig onto that on the next episode. As always, keep showing up every day because you matter. Okay, friends, have an amazing day. I'll see you later. Bye.